Monday, March 22, 2010

Hair on the pillow...and out the window!

As I mentioned, the nurses told me when my hair would fall out. Of course I had to travel for work the same week (just my luck). I was worried but determined not to let it change the way I lived my life. So I travelled to Atlanta to do some training, each morning checking my pillow for all my hair to be laying there instead of on my head. But nothing happened. When the dreaded date came I didn't wash my hair for fear it would all just magically fall out and down the drain. The date was October 25th. (Yes of course I still remember!) I made it home from Atlanta with hair, although I did start to notice some hair here and there. But in general it was nothing like you see on TV where huge chunks fall out.
The next day I went with my husband, Brad, down to Smith Mountain Lake. I had plans to go with my good friend M (Marianne) to a huge Halloween party. I had bought a costume of a rag doll. Luckily it came with a bright red yarn wig. That Saturday my hair really started coming out more. You still couldn't tell by looking at me, but I knew, and I was so worried. That night I slept over at M's house and luckily for me she is the kind of friend that did not at all mind that when I got up the next morning her sheets were covered with my hair. Just like on TV. (So bitter!) Luckily I had a ball cap, so I put it on, cleaned up the sheets as best I could, smiled and went outside to Brad waiting in the car to pick me up.
After that was maybe one of my happiest cancer days. It was a beautiful fall day in Southern Virginia. It was warm and sunny, and the leaves were just gorgeous. We took back roads home for the 4 hour drive back from the lake, and for most of them Brad had the radio up loud and all of the windows down. And I spent most of the trip on my knees with my head out the window. As he sped down Rt 29 at 55 miles per hour, my hair flew off my head, down the road, and out of my life! It was fantastic!!
By the time I got home I looked exactly like Doc on Back to the Future. So the next day I took Brad's razor and shaved the rest off myself.
I really thought loosing my hair would be the worst moment of cancer. I thought I would cry and stay in bed. But with Brad's support and sense of humor I found that each step of this thing is a choice. I didn't always pick the right choice, but life is only what we make it, and it is our choice to LIVE it.

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